VOICES

SO MANY VOICES. Like wow.

Everyone’s like, hey, I got something to say!

And I’M SURE YOU DO! Don’t we all? I feel like there are only a few times in my life when I’ve honest to goodness been rendered speechless because for the most part, I have something to say about it all.

Now, what I have to say on the matter, I will most assuredly speak with passion and then a few weeks later, I will gather more information and probably recant what I spoke so vehemently about several weeks prior. It’s exhausting. And it leaves my very Enneagram Type 1 self feel so dejected and disenchanted with myself.

Side bar: I think the Enneagram is a great tool, not the Gospel and not always true, but can be beneficial in relationships. In fact, the Enneagram is one of the topics that I used to talk about all the time. I was a huge proponent. Then I did some more research and came up with some things that made me question it. But I still find it helpful in some ways.

Now before you get all SJW on me, don’t hear what I’m not saying. There are some very real things happening in our country and in our world that some people need to wake up and recognize. Things that have kept me up at night. Things I have pleaded with God about. Things I didn’t want to know but have to know.

I feel like there are absolutely times to speak up and speak out.

BUT

Every issue? No.

Every circumstance? No.

Every injustice? No.

Wait...... I shouldn’t speak up and out about EVERY INJUSTICE?? WHY NOT??!!? 

People need to know where I stand right? They have to know right from wrong and who else will speak it to them for ME?!??! 

Oh wow. Have I ever toiled over this subject.

Listen friend.

Sometimes, it’s just noise. It’s just more noise. And there’s so much freaking noise out there, that no one is even listening anymore. Everyone is numb. It’s like driving down the highway with 3 hours left to go and the baby and 2 and 3 year old are all 3 screaming and/or singing and at some point you just turn off the radio because there’s TOO MUCH NOISE. You now are staring at the road before you, unable to form a conscious thought. Am I right?

You know why I make my bigger kids who don’t nap anymore have a quiet time?

Because it’s important to rest. It’s extremely important to learn to be quiet and still. We don’t always have to be on. We don’t always have to run at level 10. It’s a healthy, good and dare I say, biblical practice to SHUT THE HECK UP SCHNEEBLY. (10 points if you can guess that movie reference!)

And so, in conclusion, I say, give yourself permission. Permit yourself a little grace to not always take up your sword. I’m hearing a lot of this, “Your silence means you side with the enemy” type message. I’m sorry well-known author but I’m also hearing “Where words are many, sin abounds.” (Proverbs 10:19)

Permit yourself to not have to weigh in on every subject. To not call everyone out. And please for the love of Pete, find a way to laugh a little.

I’ve recently taken up recreation. I know, I know. It sounds silly. But for years, I have spent every one of my waking moments, reading non-fictions, not watching tv (especially in the last 6-12months), and if I’m not reading, I’m listening to a sermon, teaching or podcast. Constant feed of good, rich stuff, but 

all. so. serious.

So, I’ve recently started watching Heartland. Now, I’m not proud to admit that I have never binged harder than I have with Heartland. It’s like taking a starving kid to a grocery store. You gotta take baby steps ya know? Well, I didn’t. I’m currently on Season 10 and I won’t give you any spoilers but, can I just say... TAKE ME TO CALGARY!!!

I mean really, where’s my Canadian passport already? Also, Santa, I want a horse. I need to ride with the wind in my hair! I need a horse. I want to “tack” up a horse and “muck” out their stall. JK about that last part.

Can I just tell you guys a funny thing about this though, in all seriousness? I honestly feel like bringing a little bit of fun and laughter and just overall ... relief... is making me a better mom and wife. That sounds crazy. But I feel like, all I have done for years is just trying to read and consume as much literature and teachings as I can to be a “responsible adult” and my poor anxiety-ridden body and brain are exhausted!

I need life! I need adventure! I need a horse!

I also believe that God made me to love a good story. Ask anyone that knows me, I tell the longest ones. Too many details. #sorrynotsorry

I almost felt guilty for watching anything other than American Gospel or a documentary when I turned on Netflix. But ya’ll the world is so heavy right now. We all need to lighten up a bit.

This is what you need to do:

1) Shut the heck up Schneebly. (Pronounced SHNAY-BLAY)

2) Go pour out your heart to Jesus and then LISTEN TO JESUS.

3) Grab your fave snack.

4) Go turn on S1E1 of Heartland. It’s on Netflix. Go. Run. (When Calls the Heart is a goodie too.)

5) Enjoy.

There you have my very rigorous, 5 step program for surviving the seriousness of this world. Who knows.... a couple seasons in, you might feel just good enough to get back in the ring.

Ya’ll. God is our avenger. He IS coming to right every wrong. And he knew about allllll this stuff long before we found out about it. Let the Holy Spirit convict. God is working all things together for our good.

Praying you find rest in that.